Attachement (issues)

29 05 2009

Between GM and CD we have a pretty big extended family and since LML came home, we have studiously taken pictures of family members, with and without LML. We have pictures on the walls, and a number of photo albums including two that are specifically LML’s, helping to record her ‘history’ as we go along.

LML is a very affectionate child, and has seen us, her parents, model affection and loving towards each other and her and other members of her family. LML has not yet figured out that this has boundaries. She will kiss a drunken stranger as readily as her mummy or daddy. People on buses tend to adore her, as she smiles and waves and laughs and says hello and goodbye.

In preparation for a visit from CD’s parents, who we see a few times a year, we look at the pictures on the walls, at the photo albums – “look LML, Nan, Granddad.” “LML, look, Nan – nana is coming to visit” … and so we go on, for a few days.

CD takes LML to the station to meet his parent’s from the train. He finally spots them and points them out to LML. She takes off in their direction shouting “nannie” at the top of her lungs and flies into their arms. They are so pleased, so happy that this child that they have so wholeheartedly welcomed into their lives and family, is so happy to see them, so affectionate and excited to see them, despite it being four or five months since the last visit, and only the fourth time they have seen each other since LML came home.

CD looks on with a smile, enjoying his parents pleasure in his child, but never quite being able to turn off the alarm bell in his head.

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