Quote(s) of the day

26 07 2009

Grumpy Mum to Little Miss Loud, “Right, if I can’t watch ‘singing in the rain” then the telly is going off!”


GM to LML, who is being told off for hitting her little sister (again),

GM – “You must not hit your little sister”

LML – “Meow… Meow… Meow…”

GM – “Talk to me as a little girl, not a cat!”.”


Not another case of swine flu

23 07 2009

Little sis has had a temperature of over 38C over the past 36 hours. The problem parents aren’t feeling too good and LML is starting to hot up. With the BBC reporting that there have been over 100,000 new cases of swine flu over the past 7 days every cough, fever and sneeze has become a moment of anxiety.

Little Sis spent most of the day yesterday listlessly lolling in the mostly functional parents arms and today whingeing about how uncomfortable she’s feeling.

The thought of a houseful of swine flue victims really does fill the mostly functional parents with dread.

Sock it to her …

21 07 2009

GM is feeding risotto to Little Sis, and the opportunistic spoonful to LML as she goes in and out of the dinning room.

LML comes back into the room to the high chair. She has put one of her socks on her hand and proceeds to play with Little Sis, tickling her face and neck and generally being very lovely.

All are delighted.

Days Like These

17 07 2009

CD stays down stairs with LML, whilst GM takes Little Sis up stairs with her. Divide and rule may be effective, and at least Little Sis won’t be getting clonked on the head.

GM returns without Little Sis, having decided that she was ready for a nap. CD is looking a bit stressed.

“I don’t know how,” he begins “but LML managed to get BS’s nail varnish remover, and she had it in her cups and it’s all over the carpet!”

LML is happily running from room to room, and much to the relief of both parents she was clearly just playing at pouring, and hasn’t drunk any of the vile chemical.

GM gets the ‘Wet Vac’ out, as the carpet and room stink of chemicals, and proceeds to wash the carpet. As the machine is out, she decides to clean the carpet in the dinning room, which is pretty filthy, with the debris of the two sloppy eaters.

The carpet is soon transformed from grubby to vibrant colours and GM moves onto the mat by the back door which has the cat bowls on it. That is soon showing it’s original colours again too, and GM is feeling pleased with a productive mornings work.

CD has by this point tried to put LML to bed, but she just shouted at Little Sis until she woke her and refused to remain in her bed. He gives up trying to make the tired child go to bed, settles the baby back to sleep and brings LML down stairs with him.

“She’ll have to go to bed later” he sighs.

As GM is putting away the Vac, she hears CD shout in frustration. LML has poured a whole bowl of sugar over the just cleaned mat, and is busily rubbing it in!

Later in the day, GM goes up stairs to run the bath – it’s that time of the day at last.

“LML! Why have you done that?” she hears CD roar “just sit there”. This is soon followed by the distressed cries of Little Sis.

LML has found a half drunk cup of tea and has poured it all over the dining room carpet – it is not looking quite so clean any more. As soon as CD starts to clean up the mess, LML takes the opportunity to go into the other room and hit, poke and push her younger sister.

After cuddling and calming the distressed infant, GM marches LML up the stairs for her bath. Once the child is ready for bed they read a book together and cuddle on the sofa. GM sighs, breaths in the scent of the child sitting relaxed on her lap, she wonders how long it will be before things settle back into a ‘normal’ routine.

keeping in touch

11 07 2009

CD, LML and BS have gone away for the weekend, leaving GM and Little Sis Home alone. CD’s brother is getting married, but the mostly functional parents decided that it was too soon after coming home to subject Little Sis to a night away from home and a big family function. CD and GM keep in touch by text …

Friday Evening

17:24 – GM to CD .. Little Sis has managed to get the washing basket over her, and has been crawling about like a turtle! Cute.

17:32 – CD to GM .. BS has just arrived. Within 5 minutes of us getting here LML and the dog tried to make a run for it down the street. Door now locked.

18:08 – GM to CD .. Just caught Little Sis stuffing face with cat food. Was very upset when I had finished wiping her mouth out! Urg disgusting.

19:26 – CD to GM .. Everyone gone out to dress the pavilion. Just gone to the kitchen to find the dogs dinner in the bin. Poor dog!

19:28 – GM to CD .. at least she wasn’t eating it!

20:22 – CD to GM .. put LML to bed before 8. been up and out of bed a couple of times. Hopefully that’s it now. Had to sit with her and read a couple of books.

20:23 – GM to CD .. is she ok? I nearly cried when you went for the train!

20:27 – CD to GM .. she’s fine. Has been running around after the dog and loved it. She was fab on the way down here

20:37 – CD to GM .. up again! Hopefully she’ll sleep late in the morning.

20:38 – GM to CD .. she’ll get off eventually. xxx

20:59 – CD to GM .. LML asleep, I hope. Phone you later.

Repetition: the things we say .. over and over and over,

7 07 2009

Please don’t hit your little sister

It’s not nice to poke Little Sis in the eye

That’s lovely playing with Little Sis

When you hurt Little Sis it makes mummy and daddy sad


Stop! LML just stop!

Well done for playing so nicely with Little Sis

Why did you do that?

Look what you have done

That’s good sharing LML

I don’t understand what you want Little Sis

Look you’ve made her cry, she wasn’t doing anything to you and you’ve made her cry.

Oh what a lovely kiss

Be gentle with Little Sis

That’s a really good attempt at feeding Little Sis

Would you like a cuddle?

You really need to stop throwing things at Little Sis

Oh! For gods sake!

The slumber of babes

5 07 2009

It’s 11 am and LML slumbers in her mothers arms.

As she drifts away, she wonders why mummy and daddy are so grumpy. And what is it with this ‘Little Sis’ creature – when is she going back to the car that used to come with her?

She sucks her thumb and snuggles into the ample breast of Mummy. All the colours and sounds of the farmers market flicker through her memory, and with the images come the feelings – the desire to touch everything, the urge to run from one interesting thing to the next. The need to be picked up for a better view, to be put down, to get closer – to touch oh to touch, to taste, to feel. The frustration, the familiar sensation of the arched back, the arms pushing against daddy – ‘put me down put me down’ but he doesn’t understand.

Flick flick flick … it’s earlier, she has been sitting on mummy’s knee, thumb in mouth, the comfort of ‘suck’, a familiar DVD. She feels safe and content. Mummy goes away and returns with the ‘Little Sis’ . The Little Sis is funny and she laughs at her and mummy smiles at her and gives her a kiss, then mummy goes away again. The Little Sis crawls after Mummy, who calls out in a sing song voice “Little Sis, Little Sis, breakfast time”. She’s feels confused; breakfast time was ages ago, we’ve done that, she goes to see what is happening. Mummy is making something special for the Little Sis – not the same as her own breakfast – anticipation comes next – the Little Sis is going to go to the special chair, and Mummy will sit with her. The frustration bursts out and the item she is holding flies through the air, and she has Mummy’s attention again for a moment. “yaberyabberblahblah” she repeats back to her Mummy, who laughs (agreeing that she does sound like that).

Flick flick … Mummy is not looking at her, even though she is smiling and chattering. Mummy is looking at the Little Sis, she is laughing and smiling. Putting a spoon in the mouth of Little Sis. ‘My Mummy!’ she thinks and goes behind the special chair. Mummy smiles and talks to her and then her attention is gone again. She moves around to the other side of the chair, and Mummy offers her some of the special food .. it feels lumpy and slimey and isn’t good – Mummy has given her nasty food – the Little Sis is eating it – she pushes her hand in the Little Sis’s face, and is told to go away by Mummy.

Flick .. frustration, loss, confusion – you will take notice of me. Mummy bats the shoe out of the air and jumps up out of her seat. Yes! But she is marched into the other room and told to stay there and mummy leaves again. A bursting anger, escaping as a high pitched scream and then tears, and only when she is feeling spent does Mummy return. Daddy comes too, and he holds her in his arms and talks to her in his soothing voice, and the feeling of safety and contentment returns.

As she drifts into a deeper sleep, she feels the kiss on the top of her head, senses the arms holding her safely and hears the steady beat of her Mummy’s heart.

The Age of Innocence

4 07 2009

“Mummy, ook, Sis” says LML as Little Sis falls, with style, off the settee and heads towards the reluctant older sister.

Little Sis has developed two games that she really enjoys, getting on and off the settee and following LML about. Both are fraught with danger.

Too Darn Hot

1 07 2009

It’s the end of a long, long day. The mostly functional parents knew there would be days like these, but neither of them had been prepared for it to be so soon.

The morning had gone well, but in half-an-hour all started to go awry when they tried to put LML and Little Sis down for a morning nap. The previous day they had successfully managed to do this but today didn’t go so well. GM decided, Little Sis having been asleep for about, that it was time to put a clearly flagging LML to bed. Moments after she returned downstairs she heard babbling between the girls, and then the patter of LML coming down the stairs. In an attempt to ensure that LML got some sleep GM put her down in the mostly functional parents bed, where she rapidly fell into a deep sleep. Little Sis, who was now wide awake, refused to go back to sleep despite only having a maximum 30 minutes sleep and was now protesting about being confined to her cot, so having gone upstairs with one child GM came down with another.

Little Sis had an appointment in the afternoon to have special shoes fitted because she has poor muscle tone and weak ankles, so the mostly functional parents had to wake up LML and venture out in the midday sun. It was hot!

The heat got to the little ones and they were soon displaying signs of distress. Standing at a bus stop waiting for a bus home LML started to throw herself about, unwilling to wait 10 minutes in the shade of the bus shelter. She was soon throwing herself on the floor, banging her head against the shelter and hitting out at the either of the mostly functional parents who tried to restrain her.

When the family arrived back at the house things didn’t get much better. For the next four hours the mostly functional parents were like ninja body guards for Little Sis as they fended off a variety of objects aimed at her, blocking the random slaps, pokes and hair pulling whenever LML was in striking distance. GM and CD tried every strategy they could think of, time in, time out, removal from the scene, separating the two children in different rooms, putting one of LML’s favourite DVD’s on, repeatedly telling LML that her actions were making them sad, shouting, talking and stamping their feet in frustration, but non if it had any impact. LML, clearly had had enough of Little Sis, not enough sleep and too much heat.

A cool bath and a restoration of LML’s normal routine seemed to ease things. However, no sooner had LML been put to bed than she was back downstairs full of beans. CD, who had prepared dinner and gone to seek solace in cutting the grass in the back garden was distressed to see LML exiting the dining room doors into the garden at 8.30, a full hour after her normal bedtime. She was followed shortly afterwards by GM, who wasn’t at all amused to be chasing her around the garden at the end of a long day.

CD finished pottering around in the garden at 9.30, when he returned to the house he found GM on the computer looking at photo’s. “I think we deserve a drink, shall I go and get some chilled white wine from the shop?” he enquires. “Oh yes” is the relieved reply.

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