a snip in time…

25 02 2010

On Monday Grumpy Mum picked up LML from the nursery as usual. When she arrived she was called to one side by one of LML’s key workers. ‘There’s been a bit of an incident. LML has injured a little boy. She cut above his upper lip with a pair of scissors. We don’t think he’ll need stitches.”

GM gulped internally and stammered out some apologies, but she was already wondering how it could have happened. Later, she tells Crap Dad what had happened. “I don’t understand why she had the scissors unsupervised, she never does at home” she states. “I saw a boy being ‘told off’ this morning because he’d cut up a feather when I dropped LML off” CD informed her.

On Wednesday the problem parents attended a meeting that had been planned some time. The meeting included LML’s key worker, the nursery’s special needs lead and LML’s clinical psychologist. The aim was to discuss the psychologists recommendations on how to support and manage LML whilst she’s at the nursery. For the past two years the mostly functioning parents have been trying to get the nursery to increase the amount of one-to-one support LML receives, with very little success. The psychologists report and recommendations, which the problem parents had read weeks prior to the meeting, was heavily focussed on structured one-to-one work being undertaken with LML, emphasising that LML needs clear routines throughout the day and that significant interactions should be limited to a few key members of staff. The problem parents, discussing the report prior to the meeting thought, ‘they’ll never accept all this’. However, as they went through the report it became clear that things had changed.

When the opportunity came up to talk about the ‘scissors incident’ LML’s key worker said, “We’ve reviewed LML’s support and if it’s OK with you, we’re going give LML a designated worker whenever she moves into a new area of the nursery. I’m also going to give her more one-to-one support, with another worker coming to help with my group.”

The problem parents left feeling pleased about the outcome of the meeting and frustrated that it had taken such an incident to achieve what they’d been requesting for so long.





Lollo-Rosso

23 02 2010

Lolly’s birth-parents named her “Lollo-Rosso” (lets say), and this is what she was called by the Mostly Functioning Parents and their extended families, until they found out that her foster carers had shortened her name to “Lolly”.  Little Miss Loud was given pictures of her younger sibling, when the Mostly Functioning Parents decided that they could adopt her, and all these pictures were referred to as “Lolly”, so that is what LML has always called her, although her full name is still used by other members of the family on occasion.

Two days ago, as clear as day, LML shouts “Lollo-Rosso” down the stairs.  She has been calling her that about 70% of the time since then.

Bizaar!





double edged sword

22 02 2010

The letter box clatters and a pile of stuff lands on the door mat. Amongst the pile is a letters is a brown envelope from the Department of Work and Pensions. ‘Wow, that was quick’ thinks Crap Dad’. He opens the letter and scans the page, its states that its about the mostly functional parents application for Disability Living Allowance for LML.

Not really reading it, believing that it will say that their application has been turned down, he is surprised find that they have been awarded the ‘middle rate care component’. He’s initially pleased, that’s nearly £50 a week extra income. Then there is a wave of sadness as he realises that it is also a recognition of how hard he and Grumpy Mum have to work on a daily basis to support and care for their beautiful child.





kids in the park

19 02 2010

We met up with our kids brothers in the park today. The problem parents have the two girls and their brothers are placed with another family. It’s always lovely to see them and Little Miss Loud  was really excited to see them. Lolly  hasn’t really worked out what’s going on yet, she is young and was only placed with us 6 months ago, but she still ran around all excited.

The girls also have 4 half siblings, who we meet up with occasionally.

There is a bit of a family resemblance, so today, again, Crap Dad could see people looking and thinking, ‘what’s going on there then?’ There are these kids that look like each other but don’t look like the their parents.

The problem parents family has grown to include not only their own kids but also the girls siblings and their adoptive families. It’s a richness that Crap Dad hadn’t anticipated when he began this journey.





Sisterhood

4 02 2010

Grumpy Mum watches as her two young daughters walk down the hallway, and disappear into the living room.

Little Sis (now known as Lolly, because she is so laid back, and lolls around so much) started to walk entirely independently two weeks ago, and her development in every area seems to have been vertical since then.

GM feels her heart swell, as she sees the girls negotiate around one-an-other, LML accommodating her young sibling in a way that was inconceivable even a month earlier.

A few minutes later GM hears Lolly laughter and LML squeals and takes a peek into the room.  The children are playing their own version of peek-a-boo, enjoying and entertaining each other.

Bliss.








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