long time coming

31 03 2010

The Mostly Functional Parents SW did a home visit today, and she and GM had a brief conversation about a couple of other adopters just before leaving.  They talked about how hard it is for adopters to acknowledge, own, admit to or discuss any difficulties they experience with any given placement.  In particular they talked about what happens when the adoptive parents struggle to like or gel with their child.  This is something that they have talked about previously as both GM and CD initially struggled to like Lolly, and GM talked to her SW in some detail about the challenges this bought to the family.

At the end of Lolly’s day, she lay in GM’s arms.  She had finished her drink and was relaxing before bed, “eye” she said and touched GM’s eye.  Mother and daughter played a familiar and comfortable game, facing each other, touching one-an-others faces, with GM naming the parts.  As Lolly relaxed further, GM stroked her childs face with her fingertips, her jaw, her lips, her cheeks, glancing from her fingers to Lolly’s gaze and back.  Lolly became more and more relaxed and smiling, drifted off to sleep.

GM sighed deeply when she closed the bedroom door, thinking about how wonderful it is to feel such love and warmth and affection for her child.

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