Updates#1 – Lolly

31 12 2013

Lolly is 5! GM looks at the strapping stropping (not so) little girl with amazement. She has grown so much in the past 6 months, physically and developmentally.

Lolly has friends at school, although GM often worries about some of the things Lolly tells her .. Is Lolly being bullied? Is her emotional delay and her social ‘oddities’ marking her out as a victim?Just how vulnerable does her neediness make her? GM gently probes her youngest daughter but find nothing that she can put her finger on. CD does most of the school run and is not overly worried, so the mostly functional parents just watch and monitor, question and often worry.

Meal times have recently become her favoured battleground, with most meals being refused. The mostly functional parents are having to find a balance between LML’s need for regular fueling and not allowing snacking between meals for Lolly. They haven’t quite got there yet!

Lolly has attended a gymnastics class from September .. GM has the honour of taking her, and has watched her oh so slowly grasp the ‘rules’. Lolly and another child have to be repeatedly brought back on task by the teachers, she I’d more ‘clumsy’ in her movements than her parents expected, and is not as confident on the equipment as she us in a playground. GM was delighted though, when Lolly said that she would like to continue to attend. She can see the small steps of progress that Lolly has made, and knows that this will continue. Lolly finds getting up and off early on a Saturday morning painful and unpleasant (she really isn’t a morning person!), but she enjoys it so much when she gets there. She has also joined a street dance and drama group, with very similar issues of confidence and her ability to follow rapid or complex instructions.

Last but not least, Lolly is funny and sociable, sensitive, caring and affectionate. She loves loves loves her cuddles and physical contact. She often plays the baby, asking to be rocked or bottle fed and pushing her way up GMs top to be “Your baby in your tummy mummy”. She can switch from happy to major strops in the turn of a pin, and can be aggressive and violent towards LML and her parents. She is charming and chatty to strangers and always finds a playmate in playgrounds.

Lolly had a very tough introduction to the mostly functional family, being assaulted by her big sister unremittingly for the first 6 to 9 months, and having a mum that had to spend even longer than that, faking it, until eventually making it. Given all that, on top of her early start, Lolly is doing fine. She is lovely and loved and loving.



28 12 2013

Everyone is tired, LML lies on the sofa, wrapped up in GM’s new fleece, Lolly quietly plays with Christmas toys. The mostly functional parents are both slightly glassy eyed. It feels like the ‘worst’ might be over though, for now. Christmas is done, the three days of visiting, hours spent in the car and a totally wired LML.

A long walk, including a spontaneous meet up with the boys, and it’s been a much calmer evening.

Plenty of walks planned for the coming week!

%d bloggers like this: