The Big Blue

10 01 2011

The big blue package sparked interest

“My bed?” enquired LML.

“Well no, it’s Lolly’s new bed” replied Crap Dad

“My bed!” states LML

“No, it’s the mattress to Lolly’s bed”


“Would you girls like to help mummy and daddy make Lolly’s new bed?” enquired Cap Dad.

The two girls jumped up. “Yes, yes, yes” they shouted excitedly. They pushed and bumped each other as they scrambled up the stairs. Lolly jumped up and down, waved her arms in the air, spun around and yelped with joy as she saw the mattress wrapped blue plastic.

“We’ll need to take down the cot first”

The girls run around and ‘help’ with unscrewing and dismantling the cot.

As Crap Dad and Grumpy Mum assemble the frame of the new bed Lolly tries several times to clamber on. “No, Lolly, it’s not ready yet. It’s not safe, wait.” Crap dad and Grumpy Mum repeatedly say.

It’s not long before the bed is up and the mattress is being unsheathed from it’s plastic rapper. As soon as the mattress is on the bed Lolly and LML are jumping up and down on it.

“Let mummy and daddy put the bedding on.” pleads Grumpy Mum.

“Lolly’s bed, Lolly’s bed” pants LML as she jumps up and down.

Eventually the mostly functional parents persuade the excitable kids off the bed and put a sheet and quilt on.

“Wow, look Lolly, your big girls bed” exclaims GM

Lolly clambers into the bed. “Night, Night” she says as she snuggles down.

The mostly functional parents and LML laugh. “It’s not bedtime yet darling, you need to have a bath.” Lolly takes some coaxing out from under the covers.


Good morning

7 12 2010

GM lays in bed, drifting, LML sleeping against her body, warm and relaxed.  Her hand is lightly resting on LML’s ribs, and she can feel the soft breathing.  LML turns a little, and her hand moves to GM’s face.  For a few seconds she strokes and caresses GM’s cheeks and mouth, then sighs and turns away, snuggling into the warmth of her mother.


5 11 2010

Routine is everything in the Mostly Functional household, morning, noon and night.

CD & GM had had enough of 5am starts, so a month ago they bought and ‘day and night’ clock, which changes when it is morning.  It provides the girls with a very visual sign that it is morning.

At the end of three weeks the girls had started to wake closer to 5.30 in the morning most days and 6am maybe twice a week.


5.15 this morning was a vast improvement on the previous days, which have consistently been 4.something am.  For some reason LML has woken lively and unwilling to stay quietly in bed.  She shouts, kicks, objects and wakes everyone.

The mostly Functional parents hold onto the hope and belief that they will not always have to rise so early, nor battle at the beginning of their day .


15 05 2010

CD opens his eyes. Instinctively he knows its early, so doesn’t want to look at the clock. It’s what he and GM euphemistically call his turn to ‘lie-in’. He can hear LML shouting at the top of her voice  “ning, ning, nah…ning, ning, nah” repeatedly. Clearly she’s got the cat cornered somewhere, but he knows GM will deal with it or the cat will make a quick get away.

‘It’s too early’ he thinks to himself and roles over.

10 minutes later he can hear LML shouting, “You can’t catch me.” as she tries to cajole GM into an early morning chase around the living room.

CD turns over again, trying to clear his mind of work related detritus and other clutter, trying to relax enough to go back to sleep.

More time passes… Turning over again he catches sight of the clock and sees that it is 6.20. He sighs and knows that he is unlikely to go back to sleep but he’s unwilling to give up just yet.

“Wakey- wake!” shouts LML from the bottom of the stairs as she tries to rouse her little sister. Lolly replies with a moan. “Lolly awake, Lolly wake, Lolly awake” screams LML.

Feeling that this level of exhaustion will never leave his body CD rolls over and gives up any idea of getting more sleep. ‘Bugger,’ he thinks to himself, ‘if I can’t get back to sleep I’m not going to get up’. He reaches down the side of the bed, gets his book, and reads the final pages of Nassim Nicholas Taleb’s “The Back Swan”. Random events indeed.

The slumber of babes

5 07 2009

It’s 11 am and LML slumbers in her mothers arms.

As she drifts away, she wonders why mummy and daddy are so grumpy. And what is it with this ‘Little Sis’ creature – when is she going back to the car that used to come with her?

She sucks her thumb and snuggles into the ample breast of Mummy. All the colours and sounds of the farmers market flicker through her memory, and with the images come the feelings – the desire to touch everything, the urge to run from one interesting thing to the next. The need to be picked up for a better view, to be put down, to get closer – to touch oh to touch, to taste, to feel. The frustration, the familiar sensation of the arched back, the arms pushing against daddy – ‘put me down put me down’ but he doesn’t understand.

Flick flick flick … it’s earlier, she has been sitting on mummy’s knee, thumb in mouth, the comfort of ‘suck’, a familiar DVD. She feels safe and content. Mummy goes away and returns with the ‘Little Sis’ . The Little Sis is funny and she laughs at her and mummy smiles at her and gives her a kiss, then mummy goes away again. The Little Sis crawls after Mummy, who calls out in a sing song voice “Little Sis, Little Sis, breakfast time”. She’s feels confused; breakfast time was ages ago, we’ve done that, she goes to see what is happening. Mummy is making something special for the Little Sis – not the same as her own breakfast – anticipation comes next – the Little Sis is going to go to the special chair, and Mummy will sit with her. The frustration bursts out and the item she is holding flies through the air, and she has Mummy’s attention again for a moment. “yaberyabberblahblah” she repeats back to her Mummy, who laughs (agreeing that she does sound like that).

Flick flick … Mummy is not looking at her, even though she is smiling and chattering. Mummy is looking at the Little Sis, she is laughing and smiling. Putting a spoon in the mouth of Little Sis. ‘My Mummy!’ she thinks and goes behind the special chair. Mummy smiles and talks to her and then her attention is gone again. She moves around to the other side of the chair, and Mummy offers her some of the special food .. it feels lumpy and slimey and isn’t good – Mummy has given her nasty food – the Little Sis is eating it – she pushes her hand in the Little Sis’s face, and is told to go away by Mummy.

Flick .. frustration, loss, confusion – you will take notice of me. Mummy bats the shoe out of the air and jumps up out of her seat. Yes! But she is marched into the other room and told to stay there and mummy leaves again. A bursting anger, escaping as a high pitched scream and then tears, and only when she is feeling spent does Mummy return. Daddy comes too, and he holds her in his arms and talks to her in his soothing voice, and the feeling of safety and contentment returns.

As she drifts into a deeper sleep, she feels the kiss on the top of her head, senses the arms holding her safely and hears the steady beat of her Mummy’s heart.

4.00am Blues

6 06 2009

Friday 6.45pm
LML is splashing about in the bath with CD trying to maintain some sort of control. GM shouts, “Goodbye my loves” as she leaves the house for an evening with her sisters at a cousins birthday party. As the door closes LML shouts, “Bye mummy, bye”. “That’s right, we’ll see mummy tomorrow.”

Saturday 4.20am
Crap Dad turns over, half conscious, to kick what he initially thinks is the cat. Almost straight away he realises that it isn’t the cat, he could feel cotton. It isn’t GM, she won’t be back until much later. Then he realises it must be LML. She’s half way down the bed, so he rolls back the quilt. Then the questions start flooding his brain. ‘How long has she been here?’ ‘I must have been sound asleep to miss her coming into the room’ ‘Did she come in upset?’ ‘What did she think when she found out that GM wasn’t here?’ ‘Should I put her back into bed?’ ‘What if I wake her up when I do it?’

Then, Little Miss Loud jumps up, “Boo!” she says and beings laughing.

Saturday 4.22am

CD looks at his phone, sees the time and says to LML, “It’s still nighttime my love, you need to go back to bed.” he picks her up and she snuggles into his shoulder as he carries her into her bedroom. “Go back to sleep my love and I’ll see you in the morning.” he kisses her on the forehead and leaves the room.

Saturday 4.40am
CD lays in bed desperately trying to get back to sleep as one thought after another rushes through his mind, work, GM’s work, the arrival of Little Sis, the impending visit of Little Sis’s foster carers, introductions, he could use this as a blog later and, most of all, will he ever get to sleep again.

Saturday 5.45am
“Daddy, Daddieee… Look Monkey! says LML as she wakes him from his deep sleep


10 05 2009

Tired, tired, tired.

We are both so, so tired.

For the last week or so we’ve been decorating our hall, stairs and landing. Today we are both feeling the effect of working / looking after LML and then when she’s gone to sleep doing two or three hours decorating.

It’s so difficult to stop decorating and go straight to bed, we need some ‘wind-down’ time, so it’s midnight before we’ve been getting to sleep.

Then, like clockwork, LML will come into our bedroom at 5.30am and begin our day again with a cheery ‘ello, ello, ellooooooo! Mummy. Daddy. Ello!”

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