where bee be?

16 05 2011

“Where bee be? Daddy, where bee?  Bee be poorly mummy?” The stream of questions from LML begin as soon as he family walk onto main road.  The previous day they had seen a big bubble bee sitting on the pavement, and the parents had told LML that it might be resting or poorly.

As the family approach the spot from the day before they see the same bee …

“Bee poorly?  Bee be dead?” LML asks, “Lolly, bee be dead. Bee poorly!”

“Bee poorly!”repeats Lolly, looking at her sister, “bee dead?”

“Bee be dead, Lolly.  Bee poorly.” Confirms LML.

As the family leave the dead creature behind LML asks “Where bee be?”

“Bee poorly, bee dead” answers Lolly knowledgeably.


10 05 2011

Sometimes life ‘just takes over’ and some things get left behind.

There is no way to write about all the small, day to day event’s that have been experienced by the mostly functional family, over the past 4 months or so, like Lolly toilet training … and LML not, or the development’s in both children’s communication, the visits with both sets of foster carers, their various successes, struggles and (for LML) head teachers awards.

so …

There has been some snow

LML had a birthday and got a bike, which she is a little nervous of ..

Lolly liked LML’s bike so much though, that when she had a birthday … 🙂

There's been planting seeds,

and blowing bubbles (lots of blowing bubbles!).

There's been playing apart ...

... and playing together

There's been lots of trips to the park.

And even Lolly's first demonstration

The year has started well.

Sick Note.

19 12 2010

Spotty, snotty, smelly. LML and Lolly have been ill for the past two weeks.

If there was a market for snot then the mostly functional parents could have made a fortune.

The sleepless nights are now starting to take their toll. Dispositions are becoming frayed and fractious – and that’s just Grumpy Mum and Crap Dad.

Good morning

7 12 2010

GM lays in bed, drifting, LML sleeping against her body, warm and relaxed.  Her hand is lightly resting on LML’s ribs, and she can feel the soft breathing.  LML turns a little, and her hand moves to GM’s face.  For a few seconds she strokes and caresses GM’s cheeks and mouth, then sighs and turns away, snuggling into the warmth of her mother.

Dot to dot

29 11 2010

“Oh my!” exclaims Crap Dad as Grumpy Mum pulls the jumper over Little Miss Loud’s head.

The four year old’s back is facing him.  GM looks over her daughters shoulder.  “OH!” She exclaims “Sweetheart! You won’t be going back to school this week.  You’re going to have to stay off”

“Poorly?” asks the child, “me poorly?”

GM is doing a quick count as CD answers “a little bit darling, you have Chicken Pox”.

“That’s over 20 just on her back” exclaims GM, “just since she went to school this morning!”

Letter Box Contact

11 11 2010

Bring, bring…. bring bring

“Hello, letter box service”

“Hi, it’s Crap Dad, LML and Lolly’s dad. We’ve just received our letter box contact from birth mum and birth grandmother. I’m afraid they are again unacceptable. Both of them have the senders address and telephone numbers on, they are full of things like, ‘I’ll find some way to see you soon’, ‘ We’ll together again one day…’ I don’t want my daughters to see these. I’m going to have to send them back to you.”

“That’s OK Crap Dad. Would you like us to check them in future to see if they are appropriate or not?”

“Yes please.”

“OK, we’ll do that. Send them back to me and I’ll put LML and Lolly’s files in the red folder.”

“Thank you. Bye”


Family Lexicon

9 11 2010

“Lolly! ‘nap! ‘nap!” says LML “‘nap ‘nap mummy”

GM looks round and sees that LML has found CD’c foot long wooden crocodile.

She brandishes it at her sister and mum ‘nap ‘napping.

“What is it?” asks GM

“Cockabite” comes the answer.

GM smilingly agrees that it is indeed a “crocodile”, whilst knowing that this creature will soon be known by another, quite charming name.

Half term – day 3

28 10 2010

The kids are up at 5.45am, and the day starts with cuddles on the sofa and dvd’s on the TV, sugar puffs and blinis for breakfast.

CD leaves for work at 9ish and GM and LML take Lolly to nursery half an hour later.  They walk the mile to nursery, LML riding on the buggy board and walking – she is charming and funny all they way, cooperative and responsive to requests.  GM thanks LML profusely when they get to nursery. Goodbye kisses and hugs  to Lolly, who begins playing as soon as she arrives at nursery, and GM sets of to the train station with LML.

The pair go to visit Grandma, intending to stay for lunch.  The journey is great, LML being her usual loud self, but lacking any major challenges or tantrums.  They arrive early to hear that there are a number of other family members expected, and lunch will not be until 1.  GM worries that it will be a struggle to entertain an increasingly hungry and tired LML for another hour and a half, and manages to get LML to lay down with her for 15 minutes when she sees her teetering on the edge of a ‘naughty’ spiral.  This does the trick and LML continues to be delightful, if a bit – or very – cheeky with grandma.

She runs up behind the 80+ year old and smacks her bottom, or tickles her leg, or taps her elbow and when grandma turns and say’s “who’s that?” LML runs away laughing, then turns to blow a raspberry.  Grandma blows a raspberry back and makes a move in LML’s direction, making her laugh more, blow more raspberries and be more cheeky.  The pair play the game over and over throughout the visit, adding variations and developing a loose routine.  GM knows that LML will pick this game up again, next visit and hopes that her mother will remember and engage in it as enthusiastically!

8 people eventually sit down for lunch, LML eats plenty, especially given the number of people.  After lunch GM leaves for home, calling in at a playground on the way to the train station.  LML is really flagging by the time they arrive back in the home town, and falls asleep on GM’s lap on the bus home.    CD arrives home with Lolly about 45 minutes after GM and LML, and LML has had time to settle down back home and is watching a dvd when they get in.  Lolly has cuddles from GM and very very few ‘hits’ from LML and both enjoy a stress free bath time.

LML murmurs night night as she is put to bed, alreay more than half asleep.

GM leaves the room, feeling proud of her eldest daughter, and relieved that they have had one really ‘good’ day during the school break.

Half Term – day 2

26 10 2010

It’s boiled eggs for breakfast and Lolly is sitting on her Aunty J’s knee, crunching away on a bit of egg shell when she begins to cough.  And cough.  And cough. She is offered a drink, takes a reluctant sip and coughs some more.  She is becoming distressed and wants her mummy all of a sudden, still coughing and beginning to choke and cry.  Suddenly there is afountain of liquid which floats out the cm square piece of shell, and Lolly rapidly returns to her usual colour.

“No more egg shell for you then” comments Anuty J.

“But that’s the only bit she’ll eat at the moment” objects CD.

The plan is to take delivery of the shopping (we love you Mr Ocado!), do a spot of clothes shopping for the girls and then go over to their brothers for a visit.  After LML has belted Lolly for the tenth time and Lolly as moaned and whined continuously for 10 minutes GM makes a snap decision (read “snaps”) and both girls are packed off to bed for an hour.

They arrive at the H’s, in much happier moods just coming up to lunch time. The four children run around the house, screaming and shouting for the first 15 minutes.  Lolly hangs back, finding it all too intense and overwhelming maybe.  The brothers, J and D, are very excited to see their sisters, LML in particular, and yet again GM experiences a sense of wonder at the relationships unfolding before her.

LML hits out at Lolly and D regularly throughout the visit, but only once or twice to her older brother J.  D comes in for quite a lot of aggression from LML and GM notices that this appears to be ‘passed down the pecking order’ as he gives his younger sister, Lolly, a hard time in turn.  As ever GM and the boys mum manage the tellings off and talkings to between them, and the visit is enjoyed by all, despite the argy bargy and inevitable tears that come with having the four of them together in a confined space. The visit was concluded with a trip to a tiny play ground around the corner which the kids really enjoyed and afforded a great photo opportunity too.


After a detour to the supermarket for the clothes shopping the family were home by tea time.  LML and GM made cheesy blinis, which went down pretty well, LML clearing her plate and Lolly at least engaging with it.  Bath time is seen to and the girls have super while they wait for CD to get home from work (bath time is early on a Tuesday as GM and Aunty J go to a club as soon as CD gets home).  GM kisses the girls and CD and is out of the door in double quick time, leaving CD to it.  The girls are tired and chilled out.

CD takes Lolly to bed and she settled immediately, as is usual.  LML is falling asleep on the sofa soon after and CD carries her upstairs.  He puts her in bed, tucks her in and gives her a kiss.  As he is leaving the room she calls out to him.  He looks over Lolly’s cot and LML sit’s up, gives him a wink and blows him a kiss, before settling back down.  She is clearly sound asleep almost as soon as her head touches the pillow.

Half Term – day 1

25 10 2010

When she was at nursery, it was clear that LML did not really enjoy ‘time off’.  Holidays at home tended to be stressful for everyone, so the mostly functional parents kept her in nursery for her two days a week, unless it was closed or they were actually going away.

School holidays are something that the family will have to navigate carefully.

Day 1 – Lolly & LML are at home with GM.  A quiet and domestic morning is followed by a bus ride to a nice park with a great playground.  GM has arrange to meet a good friend and her children, the eldest being the same age as LML.

GM leaves early, deciding that it’s better to be out than in.  The girls have a lovely time in the play ground, but are starting to flag a bit, when the friend arrives half an hour late (that’s babies for you, always holding things up!).  The children renew their friendships, run and play , chase and generally interact.  LML only hits or pushes her friend 3 times in 15 minutes, and the friend copes well.

After 20 minutes GM can see that LML and Lolly really need to move on from the play ground so the group walk, skip, run and zig-zag through the lovely park, to the animal house (rabbits, rodents, fish & reptiles).  It’s closed – it shuts it’s doors at 3.30pm!  GM and her friend grumble at the stupidity of that and take the girls to the bandstand for a run around.

After 5 minutes LML has hit her friend about 6 times, so she is confined to the push chair.  It’s clear that she has had enough running and social interaction as she puts her thumb in her mouth and settles into the buggy.  Lolly still seems raring to go, and runs away over and over again as the group make their way to the exit, and screams her objection to being put on the buggy board.

The bus is due in 10 minutes so snacks are purchased and eaten, to ease the wait.  The bus doesn’t turn up.  Eventually, after 30 minutes, four tantrums (Lolly – 1, LML – 2, GM -1), a push chair switch-over and  half an apple, the family are safely and warmly on the bus.  LML wants to sit on a seat by herself, but GM makes her sit on her knee – “you need my body heat sweetheart” she explains and soon LML is wrapped around her mum, snuggling under the coat and warming up.

Fish fingers and chips go down a treat and it’s nearly bath time.  CD texts to say that he is stuck on a stationary bus in almost unmoving traffic.  LML has hit or pushed Lolly a dozen times in last half hour and GM is flagging big time.

After much roaring (GM) and crying (LML), both girls are bathed and ready for bed.  Peace is restored, rice cake and milk consumed.  Lolly is dozing in GM’s arms when she is carried upstairs to bed, and LML is having a cuddle and nodding off when CD finally arrives home.

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